Swollen legs . . . and panic . . .

Stephen panicked last night - the first time since he was taken ill. He is usually very positive, but last night his legs were playing him up - felt heavy and tight, and were weeping in places. They had swelled up considerably during the day in spite of frusemide (water tablets) - elastic stockings, massage and having his legs well supported above body level.

He cannot wear shoes and resorts to large old-fashioned slippers with felcro fastenings, as his feet are swollen out of all recognition.

Stephen shouted and raged against the illness for half the night - which I have now learned to ignore. I feel dreadfully sorry for him but realise he needs an outlet to get rid of the angst and bitterness. It' s difficult at times, but am determined not to play the martyr, and aim to be as loving and helpful as possible, given the cirumstances.

I rang the 'oedema' nurse at the hospice this morning and she will be in touch this afternoon.

I am hoping she will show me what to do as I don't think my massage techniques are helping the problem. I'm a bit 'rough' - which is OK for breadmaking - kneading dough - but not appropriate for a patient with very tender swollen legs.

NB: If you smoke or drink heavily I suggest you stop immediately. The information I give on this blog is only half the tale. Your future, and that of your family, will NOT be bright!