Hospice and things . . .

Stephen is still in the Hospice, which has done him a power of good - allowing him to have a complete rest and enable me to have some free time to see my family in Scotland and catch up with housework and such joys.

The Hospice is a marvellous place and Stephen is being looked after by a tremendous staff of doctors, nurses and helpers. The food is good and they have Sky so he can watch sports whenever the mood takes him and he feels well enough to concentrate. Stephen's legs are very swollen - are massaged daily by the 'oedema' nurse and he has to wear elastic stockings during the day in an attempt to reduce/move the fluid that has collected in his legs.

I don't think about quilting nowadays, but Patsy Thompson (who works in a hospice in the States) did spring to mind.

Yes, Patsy, it is a wonderful place and a tremendous help to both Stephen and myself.

Stephen now says how much he regrets having smoked heavily over the years and drunk more than his fair share of alcohol. Had he realised the amount of damage he was doing to himself, plus the pain and discomfort he would suffer, says he would have kicked the ghastly habits into touch years ago.

I spent 2 very distressing days in Edinburgh, with my grandson who is still in hospital where he will probably remain for some considerable time. He is not at all well - and I felt so sad and helpless about everything that is happening around me that I sat in the train and cried all the way from Edinburgh to Lockerbie, at which point I pulled myself together and had a cup of tea.

A couple of pastel drawings . . . .

Am not in a position to sew for the time being, so have resorted to my sketch book and an old hobby - drawing - using soft pastels . . .

Very satisfying, but messy!

Stephen going into Hospice for a few days respite.

Stephen is going into the Hospice on Tuesday for a few days while I go north to see my youngest grandson who is in hospital and has asked to see me.

Meanwhile here are a few quilts I've made over the years - to show I've not completely lost interest. Would quilt them much more extensively nowadays - especially the Square Dance.

Have been sketching some original designs for a few quilts (whilst I sit with Stephen) that I eventually hope to show. I'm pleased with the result. Need to get the colours right and start stitching. That is, if I ever have time or inclination to sew again.

The quilts shown above are:

English Patchwork over papers - "Breakdown" - Silks, cottons, on silk organza layers.

Double wedding ring - "Marriage" (contains my original wedding ring). Some gold lamé and cottons. Hand quilted using gold thread.

Tessellated flowers - Square Dance or "Hot Flush." Mainly cottons - machine quilted.

Grey strip patchwork - "Depression". Cottons - hand quilted using red thread.

Butterfly is logo of pharmaceutical company, manufacturing tranquillisers.

Stephen admitted to hospital . . .

Stephen admitted to hospital yesterday afternoon with jaundice and an increasingly swollen abdomen and legs. Blood tests taken on Tuesday evening revealed alarming high readings and suggested a blockage in his liver or/and bile duct. Inserting a 'stent' was suggested to alleviate the jaundice and terrible itching that accompanied it. He is NOT well, and I was advised to call the family. This afternoon I was informed that an operation would not be advisable given Stephen's advanced condition so I brought him home.

Stephen - Sunday 10th January 2010

Am worried about Stephen. He has stopped eating. Has no appetite - food is tasteless - takes all his time to drink the high energy liquids that have been prescribed by the hospital. At my wits end cooking food that I hope will temp him to eat - to no avail. Stephen managed to drink half a bowl of broth my neighbour kindly made for him today - but would eat nothing else. M makes the best broth in the world for which I'm grateful. Stephen has no energy - everything is an effort and he is getting thinner by the day. His legs are thin and I can feel his shoulder bones sticking out. He was such a strong, powerful man and it's distressing to see him virtually shrink before my eyes. I had a big weep this evening and am so fearful for the future.

'snowed under' with flowers . . . more arrived today . . .and very nice too . . .

I put the flowers in the conservatory each night. It's very 'cool' in there and the flowers last much longer.

Birthday is over . . .

A very quiet birthday morning was spent in front of a big log fire, drinking coffee and reading the papers. Stephen was in good spirits which was as good a birthday present as any.

My brother David, sister Sue and her partner Bob, called to see us in the afternoon which was much appreciated and we enjoyed their company. Stayed for afternoon tea as I had made some cakes. A very nice moist Victorian Fruit Cake, a large Double Ginger Cake, and some Fig and Prune Tea bread spread liberally with butter. Figs and Prunes sound ominous - but I made the (laxative) tea bread especially for Stephen and, as happened, it turned out to be bloomin' delicious, so everyone wanted a slice - or two. Moist and fruity.

Stephen became very weary by five o clock - as you can see from the above photo - and was not at all well this evening. I am worried as his colour is not good and his eyes are sunken.

The Outreach Team from the Hospice are calling to see him in the morning - to make sure he is alright. Let's hope they can do something to make him feel better.

It's my birthday today. Wot a difference a year makes! Present day and last year's photo.

Am surrounded by flowers!

Can you keep a secret? I'm 76 today!